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You’re starting a new job and you want to get off to a good start. But in the process of trying to get it right, you’re making a key mistake.

“How is the new guy in your office?” I asked a friend a few years ago. “He is trying so hard to prove himself. It’s really annoying. We’re pretty fed up with him already, I hope he settles down soon.” My friend answered.

Have you had a new colleague you felt this way about? Or are you cringing now because you know you’ve been that new person really trying to prove yourself?

Back in 2006, I was nervous about starting a new job. My very first coach said to me: “Just think of how great they will all feel just because you’re there and because you’re showing up.”

I mulled this over for a long time thinking I didn’t know whether I would be any good at the job. But that was completely missing what my coach was trying to say.


When you’re starting a new job it’s easy to think it’s about you, but it’s really about them (the people you’ll be working with).


The people who have hired you, the people you will be working with, are all excited that you’re starting because they are hoping that now “help has arrived”  and things will getter better. They are busy thinking about how the gap in work force will be filled and they are looking forward to sighing of relief as they can stop doing more than their fair share.


The best thing you can do, when starting a new job, is to go into your new work place focusing on everyone else, listen and build relationships.


Let your first instinct be: I need to figure out what would make other people’s lives easier and better. Rather than: I need to figure out how to prove myself.


Turn down the volume of your inner dialogue. That’s the voice that is questioning will I get ahead here, was this the right job, will they like me, can I deliver… Because it gets in the way of you being present.


So how do you get out of your head? 

Simplest way – take a breath. It gets you into your body and into the present moment. 

For more information about Noomi Melchior Natan and Leadership Behind the Scenes go to www.noominatan.com

[EP 16] Key mistake leaders make when they’re starting a new job

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